Recent natural disasters, home mortgage crises, stock market volatility and credit constriction are proving to be tremendously difficult for some of the most at-risk members of our society. New parents, particularly pregnant and postnatal women, feel naturally compelled to create a stable home environment for their babies. Rapidly fluctuating hormone levels and brain chemistry only elevate their increased stress levels.
Unstable world environments can make the creation of a stable home life impossible, ramping up stress and wreaking havoc in parent’s minds and bodies. A stressed mother equals a stressed baby, but the reverse is also true. Helping a new mother feel more secure will have a positive effect on the baby as well. Here are some tips to cope with difficult times:
1. Focus on the Present. It may be tempting to think about the list of problems stretched out ahead of you. This will only lead to a downward mental spiral. Instead, ask yourself if you and your baby or child are safe for the moment. If you are, take a deep breath and allow a moment of gratitude. If not, do whatever you need to do to get the two of you into a safe environment and take it one day at a time.
2. Encourage Honesty. You may feel sad, mad, glad, scared, or some confusing combination of these. You don’t have to make sense of any of it right now. Whatever you feel is O.K. Supressing your emotions for any length of time can be hazardous to your health. Acknowledging whatever you feel from the inside out can free up vital life energy to allow you to move forward.
3. Make a Connection. You may not know it yet, but you are in good company. Reaching out to others and sharing your story can bring healing and comfort. Sometimes this is possible face to face, but other options are available. Consider connecting with an online support group. Knowing that just a single person or small group cares about you, even if they are long distance, can provide strength for you to carry on.
4. Find Small Ways to Nurture Yourself. It is truly possible to find beauty in some of the most difficult environments. To get there, you need to find out what you love with each of your senses. Ask yourself what you love to hear, what you love to taste, what you love to feel, what you love to see, and what you love to smell. Sure, expensive treats are nice, but you might be surprised to realize there are simple ways to nourish yourself daily. Pay attention to what brings you pleasure, and allow a few minutes a day to really notice those things. It could be the taste, sight and smell of a beloved food, the soft skin and sweet scent of your child, the sight of a sunrise or the soothing warmth of a long-awaited shower. Choose at least one thing each day to focus on for each of your senses to sustain your well being.
5. Cover the Basics. Sleep, eat, drink water, and breathe. It may not seem like much, but accomplishing these basics will give you strength and help you through to easier times.
6. Ask Others for Help. This is no sign of weakness. On the contrary, you prove your competence by asking for help for yourself and your family when you need it. Do you need help finding information, food, housing, resources, or a supportive network? People might not know what you need unless you tell them. Don’t let your pride interfere. Give yourself permission to ask for help and increase your chances of finding the resources you need.
